Being Jaded

I don't know why our society likes to emphasize how vital enthusiasm, passion, hope, optimism, 110% effort and commitment are the keys to success, happiness, and well-being. I find that more often than not, those are things that often drive you absolutely crazy. The thinking positively mantra drives me crazy as well because more often than not it s also a recipe for self-denial and entraps you into a vicious cycle whereby you think you must suck if you are not thinking positively (when yes, your life actually does suck... start picking up the pieces, its okay).

I am a firm believer in the power of jadedness.

I don't know why that state of mind is viewed so scornfully since it is usually the true vehicle of honest effort and productivity. Being passionate is completely overrated in this society for the following reasons:

1. While being passionate is good for jump-starting projects, it s not good for when things actually start sucking. Your passion gives you a fairly good beating in the midst of paralysis and I find that it is when I'm jaded and stop caring altogether that I finally sit down to do some real work. Don't care. It helps.

2. It makes you easily taken advantage of by others. The blinding feelings of positivity and hope you feel will often lead you to hope for the best in others. This is the worst lie I've been fed my whole life... the mantra that if you hope for the best you will bring out the best. Nothing could be further from the truth. What is the truth however is that human behavior is generally governed by certain rules-- e.g. desire for social acceptance, social benefit and connectedness, sex, material comfort, sense of purpose, accomplishment, and ego-massage etc. If you tap into those laws (and examine how these play out in yourself) you will find that life will go a lot smoother.

3. Better to not have your heart twisted in a knot every time something doesn't work out. Flaming out happens because the powerful emotions attached to investment in a project's success (the spark of inspiration, divine purpose. etc.) become overbearing-- if you allow yourself to fully experience the roller coaster of emotions (excitement-->disappointment-->excitement-->disappointment) as a result of your divine inspiration tanking every so often, YOU WILL FLAME OUT. The majority of honest productivity and success comes from something not all that glamorous-- consistently applied effort. Honestly, consistently applied effort will suck. Better to erect the wall of jadedness now to protect yourself... it is your body's mechanism for dealing with consistently applied effort.

4. 110% in everything you do is also one of the worst pieces of advice I've ever received. It is just not possible and anyone who attempts this will fail. Success is more like 110% consistently applied effort to a project of choice for a 1/3 of your life tops or once every three weeks for the rest of your life.

5. Commitment to everything you do is also overrated. Toss out the things that suck. NOW. Change a situation that sucks. Sometimes things aren't working out.

Jaded plugger> inspirational flame-out.